Pondering the science of Happiness! Learning tingles!
The happiness of people in our social networks is much more
significant than you think. Our friends influence what we think of as
normal, and that influences our habits, feelings, and behavior, which,
in turn, make us happy. Or unhappy. As Christakis and Fowler have found
in their research in "Connected" only 50% of happiness is genetically
based, 10% about life circumstances and the rest from our social
network. research shows that our colleague's next-door neighbor's
best-friend or office mate --someone we have never met... influences how happy we are! Isn't that amazing?
“Changes
in individual happiness can ripple through social connections and
create large-scale pattern in the network,” write Christakis and Fowler,
“giving rise to clusters of happy and unhappy individuals.” 3 degrees
of separation.
Dr. Christine Carter from UC Berkeley sums it up really well:
"Research
suggests that happiness is a set of skills we can teach and practice
with our children. But, it turns out, the people in our social
networks—in schools, especially, because proximity plays a role—are also
teaching and practicing things that influence how happy our kids are.
Think about your friends.
Are they a little weak in the happiness department? Are they
super-busy and talking obsessively about our country’s leadership
problems? Are they always complaining about how they hate their boss
and how their son’s teacher is an idiot? Are they burdened by a
classmate’s peanut allergy or whiny about a hubby who never gets his
socks in the hamper?
Or maybe you have friends with excellent
happiness habits. Perhaps they are more grateful for what they have
than whiny about what they don’t. Maybe your friends get lots of
exercise, and enough sleep, have tight connections to friends and
family, and these things make them frequently cheerful.
Our
habits make us happy—or not. And our habits are influenced, in large
part, by our friends’ habits. What do we see as normal? Busyness and
cynicism? Or gratitude and mindfulness? Materialism and fancy
vacations? Or time with close friends and dinner at home?
Make
no mistake: Our social connections influence our happiness. While all
three of those choices in the above pop quiz do affect how happy we
are, the one we often overlook is the invisible ties we have to
everyone in our social networks. This means that increasing your own
happiness, and the happiness of your children, is a great way to
contribute to the greater good. And encouraging happiness habits among
your friends has positive ripple effects throughout their social
networks, your family included. I hope you will join our discussion
about this!
"© 2011 Christine Carter, Ph.D Greater Good the science of a meaningful life."
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